the truth i can't tell

High school felt like a constant competition, from academic work, to social groups, to beauty. It all became numerical, best grade,favorite student, best friends, best boyfriend, prettiest, best body. Perfection felt like a requirement, you had to be smart but not so smart that you hurt your friends feelings by getting better grades, and you always had to make jokes in class with your friends but not so much that it upsets the teacher, and you had to be flirty but not slutty otherwise your a ‘pick me’ girl, clear skin and no heavy make up otherwise your a try hard, and you can’t be so skinny that people think that you have an ED, but not fat because everyone knows boys don’t like fat girls and girls don’t hang out with other girls that boys don’t like. You can’t tell people your dreams because then you seem too confident but you have to have some ambition otherwise they will think you are stupid. Never tell your achievments, never show off, but don’t be ashamed, simply be quite and stop distracting the boys